The burden of being the boundary setter

On exes, "I miss you" texts, and the emotional labor of protecting your heart. Also, I'm coming to London. Come hang out with me!

Hi Cool Dancer,

I want to talk about something that makes my heart ache just thinking about. The burden of being the boundary setter. And what I mean by that is twofold.

It means that after a breakup, or a fizzle, or whatever-have-you:

If you were the less emotionally invested person, and your ex continues to try and talk to you, you have to set the fucking boundary—even if it hurts them.

It also means that if you were the more emotionally invested person, and your ex keeps texting you, you have to be the one to set the boundary—even if it hurts you. OOf. It hurts just writing this.

P.S. Join me on Saturday, May 10 in London for a shamelessly cathartic night of sketching, sexuality, and hanging out with me (plus my favorite vibrator as a gift!). Come to my Sip & Sketch—Early bird tickets (very limited) just dropped!

Paid annual subs get a discount—shoot me a message if that’s you. x

Now, back to the ache….